You are your own unique person. You have your own goals, your own likes/dislikes, your own preferences for food, friends, activities, and so much more. There are sometimes similarities between people, but there will only ever be one you, and that makes you unique and interesting – someone that deserves to love who they are in every way.
But we are often faced with this feeling like who we are isn’t enough, and that there is someone else that we want to be. This can affect a person’s mental health. Problems develop psychologically when there is an inconsistency between you who wish to be and who you actually are, and learning to know and accept yourself becomes a critical tool for addressing these mental health issues.
Personal Growth is Good – When It’s For You
This isn’t too imply that you shouldn’t want to change anything about yourself. Wanting to improve yourself as a person is good and healthy. You can and should think about ways that you can improve your abilities, your character, your strength in coping with emotions, and more. That’s what therapy is for, for example.
But the goals that you set for yourself also need to be in line with your character, your nature, and what is realistically capable. For example, someone that is generally introverted probably does not benefit from desiring to be an extrovert, and hoping they can change themselves to be an extrovert. That is because:
- This is difficult, if not impossible, as it is a core part of your character.
- This desire indicates a dissatisfaction with yourself as a person, and a longing to be someone that you are not.
We see this often with a lot of characteristics that people want to change for themselves. They’re not changes that enhance a characteristic of theirs they already appreciate. Instead, they represent a desire to be someone else – an inherent belief that who they are now is wrong, and who someone else is is better.
Accepting Yourself is Critical for Finding Helpful Solutions to Problems
Learning to truly accept yourself for who you are at your core is an important part of making sure that you are not only happier, but you can also work on self-development more successfully. Using the same example as above, an introvert that accepts they’re an introvert can find ways to be more social and outgoing that are in line with themselves and their values, rather than trying to be someone they are not.
For people that want to change themselves for the better – which is a good and healthy thing to do – the best way to do this is to also fully accept who you are, and use that rather than try to ignore that when looking for ways to improve oneself.
